Ok yesterdays little conversation is going to revolve around Driving. More specifically my driving of course with my copilot wife beside me. So let's get started.
I would like everyone to know that my wife has the uncanny ability to read signs all of at least 20 feet in front of the vehicle. Now this would not be a problem if we were parked in some empty lot which there are a lot of down here. But when your in town driving a 1 ton extended cab long box dually at 45-50 miles per hour in 4 lanes traffic it doesn’t offer a whole lot of assistance to me, as pilot, to be 190 ft past the turn when she announces, Oh there is where we wanted to go.
Now you're probably thinking, well idiot why not use your phone or the GPS you bought for the trip. Well to be honest the GPS is grounded to the camper because it been naughty sending me on the last gravel road to nowhere while telling me I am going somewhere or told me something was just 3 miles away only after driving 6 miles for me to discover it thinks I am still in Flagstaff and not Yuma. So rather than drive the POS over with the truck my wife suggested giving it a time out. Yea this way I will eventually remount it in the truck and go thru this all over again. Yea Ok!
Ah and let's not forget the phone………. that at least 23% of the time it sends you in a loop back to the same road that is not completed. It is fun though as you get a chance to see where you want to go and then remember that old saying “you just can’t get there from here”!
I am a little surprised at both my wife and the two golfers that were staring at me as I stopped at the entrance of some swanky golf course to (ready for this) “recalculate” my trip. Now this may come as much as a surprise to you as it did to me when my wife in response to the look the golfers were giving me, laughed saying, you really don’t look like a golfer. I mean really I got on my olive green cargo pants (if you have seen me in the last 5 years you know what they look like), a bright orange t-shirt, my new blue suspenders and my old man slip on shoes and she is telling me I don’t look the type. I was shocked especially as I was contemplating driving my dually across the course to the location that (you may have heard this one before) “You just can’t get there from here”.
Ok so all is well. I shut down everything electronic and using something Old School called Line of Sight turned the dually around in the golf course parking lot (more looks from golfers), drove back thru the car dealership lot again where several sale staff look at us in awe, crossed a busy 4 lane road at my wife suggestion and drove back to the turn I originally missed, Yea we made it to WALMART not the one that is only 2 miles away, but to this one that is 6 to 10 mile away depending on if you are following me or not.
As long as I am confessing I might as well mention a small little incident that happened yesterday while driving as well.
I have met a great guy from British Columbia called Norm whose motor coach is parked just across the street from us. Now Norm has been full time RVing for 6 years and he and I have been giving each other crap since we met. He is about 75 years old and the other day he was putting in an additional water hose inlet to connect to the tank flushing system. He was trying to figure out how to center the inlet with the other one next to it so he could drill the 3 inch hole. So I helped him dial it in while giving him crap about how long flat rate was on this job. I also told him he should hang up a sign that said RV and Tractor Repair. Now first off Norm’s rig is spotless diesel pusher that is in immaculate condition. So he is always putzing on it to keep it looking like new. And has more than enough money to hire anything he wants done to it he just likes to putz.
But now to the point I found a sign that said Garage and with Cindy’s help doctored the sign up to say Norm’s RV Garage and hung it on the front of his coach as a joke. Well to pay me back a day or two later he told me about a special RV shop that sold a polish cloth mounted on an extendable pole he had that I liked. He gave me some very general direction to the shops location although he could not remember the shops name.
Ok now the kicker, his direction take me 8 miles into downtown Yuma and I am talking Old Down Town. The 4 lane road with a turn lane center was all tore up and down to two lanes. There were orange cones up everywhere with a lot of side streets close off as well. I had thought I would for sure spot the RV shop only to come to the conclusion that Yuma has a population of 100,000 during the summer and grows to 250,000 during the winter months so there even in Down Town is a RV shop on every block.
Did I mention I drive a 1 ton, extended cab long box dually and am just barely squeaking by in all the traffic. Yes it was rush hour of course. Well after almost reaching the end of the road I did what needed to be done. Unable to turn with traffic and risk staying downtown all night waiting to get back across the road and rather than turn at the next street, crossing traffic that I would need to wait for for ever. I took the logical way out by zipping between a car and two cones turning into an empty lot, I am sure the look on both my and my wife face was priceless when we realize that after the apron and sidewalk the drop into the empty lot was at least 2 foot deep. So now stopped with my dually hanging into the oncoming traffic lane I did what every normal Minnesotan would do. After my wife said you can’t (I just love a challenge), I turned tight and started driving the dually down the sidewalk. The drivers in Yuma are so friendly that several honked their horn as they drove by and some even waved at me. Even more so when I decided to back out into traffic and head back to camp for a serious chat with my old buddy Norm.
Moral of the story: if you going to be an idiot let people know by making sure you have an out of state plate and it doesn’t hurt to be driving something much bigger than they are. As always it's an Adventure!
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